Ouch not as much

I guess I should update you on the great dr’s appt I had yesterday.   Well, great doctor, lots discussed, and I’m down about another pound, so those are good.  Bad was my blood pressure was high for probably the first time in my life.  I’ll blame work for that one.  All my blood tests were good except the CBC.  As suspected, I’m back down again.  Hemoglobin was a 9, and the last time I went into the hospital for a transfusion it was 8.  I have to take iron pills twice a day until my next appt in a month and they’ll recheck. 
 
We also did a flip flop on my meds, back to something close to what my rheumy had me on in December 2006, since thankfully my dr was able to read what I had been on in the notes.  I’m so thankful that the dr’s office in Dallas really did fax my records over since I hate whining that I hurt to a dr and it looking like I’m a junkie.  So now my daily meds are – AM: cymbalta, zyrtec, and my vit B stress complex.  I’m supposed to have a slow-release iron pill there too, but I thought I had some at the house and I didn’t.  I have to go back to the drug store this afternoon.  PM: mobic, ultram, and another stupid iron pill.  This morning I pulled out one of my lidoderm patches for my lower back too, and I think it might be working some.
 
What was neat was that when I told a coworker who was in the office that I had to go for my appt yesterday, and he pressured me into telling him what it was for, he was surprised.  He told me he would have never known if I hadn’t have told him, and I’ve worked with him nearly a year.  I told him, you don’t see me move too much from my chair though – that’s how you can tell.  He told me that I was always so peppy and stuff that it surprised him. 

And on another note altogether – Happy Clone Wars Day!  I’m taking my young padawan and his big sister to the theater either this evening after work, or more likely, after some back to school shopping tomorrow.  It’s Tax-Free weekend in Texas, but my budget’s so tight this year (thanks to my ex missing his last two child support payments), I won’t really be able to enjoy the shopping experience like I have before.  It’s probably going to be Target for the turkey’s supplies and a couple extra pieces of clothes, Payless for shoes for them both, and 5-7-9 in the mall for the teenager.  I figure after that much stress and walking, it would be nice to sit in an air conditioned theater with a huge tub of fake-buttery popcorn and some junior mints.

Ouch a little bit

It’s been a while since I last wrote about my health.  I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis a couple years ago, with myalgia (he never used the phrase “fibromyalgia” so I don’t either, even though my grandmother was diagnosed with it some years ago also).  I went through a huge depression, where I could only see a life of pain and obstacles.  It was probably my mother’s constant complaining about her ails that made me see that all that negativity would not help me one bit, that I had two amazing children to take care of no matter what my physical condition.  I decided I would not my “disease” rule my life. 

But I’ve been wearing down lately.  It’s been a little over two years since my last transfusion, and I had blood work done at my family doctor’s office probably six weeks ago.  I accidently missed my follow up appointment, but I called and rescheduled for today.  The thing is, she said they would just send me a letter saying all bloodwork normal if that was the case, but that letter never came. 

I did the back work and made sure my rheumatologist’s office in Dallas faxed over my records.  I know I need to be more aggressive in my treatment at the moment, even though I hate what it might make me look like.  I’m in my mid-thirties and in constant pain.  Most days it’s managable.  Some days it isn’t.  Those are the days I need something more than the four Aleve I take each day.  But without records, backup, it’s awkward telling a fairly new doctor that you need drugs for pain.  I know what it must look like.  So instead of pushing the point I usually back off, frustrated and sad. 

I’m still fairly active.  Not athletic by any means, and some activities are very restricted.  I cannot kneel – the turkey boy must stand up in the tub to have his hair washed.  I cannot bend too much, so I don’t empty the dishwasher if I can avoid it.  And there came a time when I had to stop playing Final Fantasy because my hands and wrists couldn’t manage the controller for any long periods of time (and everyone knows, you can’t just play Final Fantasy for a few minutes).

So wish me luck today, that I might have the courage to ask for what I need.  That I might eventually have a pain-free day.  In the meantime, send me your jokes to cheer me up, because laughter really does work wonders.

Peace.